Saturday 9 June 2012

Road to recovery

After I was diagnosed with depression I decided, that I wanted to kick it and fight it, it had rule my life for far to long. I changed my hair back to its original blonde ( I changed it to chestnut brown when Harrison was 14weeks old) in the hope I would find me again and it did actually help.

I had 6 weeks off work In total and did 3 weeks jury service before I was able to return back to "normal". In that time I really did start to find me again, I started smiling again and I started being able to push myself to the point I mowed the Lawn. now to most people that's not a big deal but to someone suffering from depression it really is a big deal to even be bothered to start and finish a task is a big deal. I was so proud of myself for doing it that it encouraged me to want to do more.

I started having pride In the house again, wanting to get out of bed and start my day. I started feeling a connection with my family again and most of all I was laughing again.

I still have my good days and bad days like everyone its just knowing the different between feeling depressed and just standard fed up and now I do thanks to being properly educated on depression.

the problem with depression it's the taboo that's attached due to people ignorance. When I was at my worst I heard people say that I needed to get a grip, if only it was that easy. Every day I wanted to get a grip but its just doesn't work that way. People suffering with depression need help, need to be listen too and most of all allowed to share what's wrong with them instead of hide what's going on with fear of being judged. The more people can talk about what they are going through the easier it is for other to realise there not alone and maybe help people before us too late.

For anyone who has suffered depression it's an on going battle right now I'm in a good place and hopefully this is where I will stay. I recognise the symptoms now and with that I hope to be able to catch myself before I fall.

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